I practically just want to abandon blogging. I dont feel any motivation of typing about my life. Everything had been nothing but sadness, frustration and anger. I had to endure 2 months of family frustration. Not to mention my first time witnessing such horrific actions and behaviour of my dearest family member. Screaming nonsense, shouting, hitting, throwing things, you name it. Imagining seeing all these almost everyday from morning till midnight. Bringing back the past that has no relation with younger generation and dragging them in or their childrens past. It doesnt makes sense actually. Thats how one person will act when they got lost control of themselve. He/she wouldnt care less of how bad spoken they are and hurt people's feeling. They wouldnt accept and refuse to accept the fact that lies in front of their eyes. I dont need to be reminded about the past as I have eyes to see who didnt their part as and adult. I wouldnt blame the person for reacting that way for she had been mentally tormented due to her close minded thinking, keeping everything in her heart. No one would understand what I felt unless you've experience what I've been through. I appreciate friends and family who cares for me
I am greatly affected by it and may lose my sanity anytime soon. I'm still able to keep my mind straight up till now. Probably my philosophy "I look forward and never look back" that has been pushing myself. Other than that, I cant say Im in good shape. I'm not gaining weight, my arms are skinny and low blood pressure. What's the cause of low blood pressure eh?
I do feel lonely at times since my close friends have gone overseas for studies. Even though we are separated by the huge deep ocean and time difference, that wont stop us from reaching each other!!!! T^T I shall await you guys return.........*gaze into the sky*
Its time I should stop whining about my how shit my life is now. IT'S JUST HOW LIFE IS. I will always remind myself there are other people suffer more than me. Shit things happen for some reason whether you believe it or not. It may be a test by the higher up *points* or it could be just pure bad luck. Nevertheless I'm glad my grandpa has recovered more than we could imagine. Thats all I ask. Off to play Supreme Commander with my comrades!!
Monday, May 3, 2010
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Cute & bloody!!!
What is cute and bloody I’m talking about? This is referring to a PS3 demo game that i’ve played few days back which is known as THE FAT PRINCESS. Yup, “THE FAT PRINCESS” weird title huh? Its not just a plain random title, its a game about the fat princess itself! Make sense right? LOL. I’m only stuck with one map since I’m playing the demo version. Maybe I might purchase the full game for RM50. There’s no cd for it since the game is so small. 
One of your quest is to save your princess which is locked up at the enemies castle. How did “The Fat Princess” came about? Technically, your princess (slim) loves to eat cakes. Your enemy will feed her with cakes to make her fat! When she gets fatter, she gains weight make it harder for you and your teammates to carry her back to your castle.
I mean REAL OBESE!! anymore cakes?
You start of as a peasant with 2 lives along with the stun ability and run fast. Surely you wont last long with just as a peasant. You have 5 classes to pick: priest, mage, worker, ranger and warrior. I always start of with worker to get resources and I find it very useful. You can switch into any of it anytime you want by picking up their specify class hats. Each classes have their own abilities. They have their 2nd ability if you upgrade their buildings.
Workers: axe wielder – chop trees, mine ore and upgrade buildings. 2)bomb killer
Priest: 1)the healer – heals party members, 2)the dark priest – suck people’s life,
Mage: 1)Fire caster – damage higher 2)ice caster – freeze enemies,
Ranger: 1)bow and arrow – shoot faster, 2)gun – shoot slower, damage higher
Warrior: 1)sword & shield – block attacks, 2)javelin,
You may choose to collect resources to upgrade your classes building or become an offensive player and hunts people down and save your pretty princess. A worker class can only cut down trees, mine ores, upgrade buildings, The overall presentation is colourful, cutesy characters but bloody XD. You see bloods everywhere whenever you hurt or kill a player. Body parts are scattered around. It doesn’t look gory at all. That’s the fact it make the game interesting~ XD which I think. Most of the time you will be multi-playing with other online players. Much more challenging than playing with pc. There are rankings for every player. If you are rank 1st in the winning side, you will turn into an unbeatable grim reaper until the new game begins. Wherelse if you are ranked 1st in the losing side, you will transformed into an unbeatable big chicken. Really jokes la.......This game revolves with strategy and teamwork. You can communicate with other players to cooperate who does what and so. Since I don’t own a microphone, I’ll just have to look at the situation and change my strategy to save the princess and defend the castle.
One of the round I’ve played, I have no idea how 2 grim reapers appeared. Apparently, I was one of the top players along side with another player. It’s funny since there will only be one top player unless we both have the same scores at the same time. How coincident~
Priest: 1)the healer – heals party members, 2)the dark priest – suck people’s life,
Mage: 1)Fire caster – damage higher 2)ice caster – freeze enemies,
Ranger: 1)bow and arrow – shoot faster, 2)gun – shoot slower, damage higher
Warrior: 1)sword & shield – block attacks, 2)javelin,
You may choose to collect resources to upgrade your classes building or become an offensive player and hunts people down and save your pretty princess. A worker class can only cut down trees, mine ores, upgrade buildings, The overall presentation is colourful, cutesy characters but bloody XD. You see bloods everywhere whenever you hurt or kill a player. Body parts are scattered around. It doesn’t look gory at all. That’s the fact it make the game interesting~ XD which I think. Most of the time you will be multi-playing with other online players. Much more challenging than playing with pc. There are rankings for every player. If you are rank 1st in the winning side, you will turn into an unbeatable grim reaper until the new game begins. Wherelse if you are ranked 1st in the losing side, you will transformed into an unbeatable big chicken. Really jokes la.......This game revolves with strategy and teamwork. You can communicate with other players to cooperate who does what and so. Since I don’t own a microphone, I’ll just have to look at the situation and change my strategy to save the princess and defend the castle.
One of the round I’ve played, I have no idea how 2 grim reapers appeared. Apparently, I was one of the top players along side with another player. It’s funny since there will only be one top player unless we both have the same scores at the same time. How coincident~
look at the blood~~~~ bwahahahah!!!
Saturday, February 13, 2010
news news~
what you're about to read is yet another not so good news. really....whats wrong with this year...? and its just early of the year. I'm reviving my blog with BAD NEWS rather than good. Not that I wanted to but thats what have been happening around me. I've heard nothing but more bad news. Regarding my grandpa's situation, I would say he is "quite" stable up till now. Its been about 3 weeks he admitted to hospital. My family almost had a heart attack two weeks back. It was great when we see him getting better day by day, able to move his left side of the body and gain his concious back. His feelings came back as well and thats where it is hurting. He was crying, angry at himself of his position when he was still in ICU.
A couple days later, he was transferred to HDU, not so serious as ICU. He responded our calls with nods, hand gestures and even try to talk but couldnt. Blood pressure goes up and down. The bleeding in his left brain have stopped which is good news!! As he knew he is sorta getting better, he began impatient, moved vigorous showing off by moving his legs that he is moving!. Oh...the next thing I heard, he even tried to come down from the bed!! gosh!!! Due to that, his pressure got much higher than before. He also tried writing but not so clear. He was moved to normal ward a few days later.
On the day he was moved to his room, around nighttime he wasnt responsive. We call him, shout at him, shake him yet no reaction from him. His breathing and heartbeat was very shallow. About 30 secs later, he took a deep breath, heartbeat back to normal for few secs and he goes back shallow. This goes on for as along as we are there. Immediately call the nurse, gave him oxygen mask and was sent back to ICU..... For that moment, we thought we were gonna lose him. To be truthful, Im not ready.... I'm still hoping the best from him. Despite hearing discouragement from others, I believe he can heal and it is not his time to leave yet. I would not expect him to recover as well as how he is before. Im still praying till this day. His condition was back to where he entered hospital.
Apparently neurologist surgeon didnt do a good job, changed to a new neurologist. He was stablelise and moved back to normal ward. We were happy he managed to move his throat. Energy coming back slowly. He was restless...moving here and there.....pulling tubes and stuff around him....asking to go home.... The new neurologist gave him a traditional chinese medicine which will him gain energy easily. It works well on him. It was a miracle!! Rushed to the hospital, saw him sitting on the chair with his eyes open!! He even waved at us, crossed his legs (gosh!), even place his face on his hand looking boredly. Hahaha!! You have no idea how happy I was. I almost cried with joy. Really thank God! Its a huge recovery for him. Ever since then he is more awake and energetic. Well...still not strong enough to stand up on his own or do usual things.
A couple days later, he was transferred to HDU, not so serious as ICU. He responded our calls with nods, hand gestures and even try to talk but couldnt. Blood pressure goes up and down. The bleeding in his left brain have stopped which is good news!! As he knew he is sorta getting better, he began impatient, moved vigorous showing off by moving his legs that he is moving!. Oh...the next thing I heard, he even tried to come down from the bed!! gosh!!! Due to that, his pressure got much higher than before. He also tried writing but not so clear. He was moved to normal ward a few days later.
On the day he was moved to his room, around nighttime he wasnt responsive. We call him, shout at him, shake him yet no reaction from him. His breathing and heartbeat was very shallow. About 30 secs later, he took a deep breath, heartbeat back to normal for few secs and he goes back shallow. This goes on for as along as we are there. Immediately call the nurse, gave him oxygen mask and was sent back to ICU..... For that moment, we thought we were gonna lose him. To be truthful, Im not ready.... I'm still hoping the best from him. Despite hearing discouragement from others, I believe he can heal and it is not his time to leave yet. I would not expect him to recover as well as how he is before. Im still praying till this day. His condition was back to where he entered hospital.
Apparently neurologist surgeon didnt do a good job, changed to a new neurologist. He was stablelise and moved back to normal ward. We were happy he managed to move his throat. Energy coming back slowly. He was restless...moving here and there.....pulling tubes and stuff around him....asking to go home.... The new neurologist gave him a traditional chinese medicine which will him gain energy easily. It works well on him. It was a miracle!! Rushed to the hospital, saw him sitting on the chair with his eyes open!! He even waved at us, crossed his legs (gosh!), even place his face on his hand looking boredly. Hahaha!! You have no idea how happy I was. I almost cried with joy. Really thank God! Its a huge recovery for him. Ever since then he is more awake and energetic. Well...still not strong enough to stand up on his own or do usual things.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Some ungrateful friend
I was sorta rushing my advertising visual assignment last night until I received a msg from a friend. He was emoing telling me about his relationship problems, asking if he could call me. I said no as im concentrating on rendering my visual but i'll read your msg online. It'll be pointless since my mind is so focus on the screen than the phone. The next thing he said "I'm SELFISH. I'm just like her gf. All girls are the same." WTF is that? Comparing me with her? Oh please~~ I'm hear at least making an effort to listen your rants and you're saying this to me? Who's selfish now? I'm sorry~ Go find your "buddies" or anyone who is more free to listen your call. You dont appreciate a lil help. Don't come find me.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Answer my prayers.....
A brand new year where everyone set their own resolutions on what to achieve, what to do and such. Here I am hoping for a better year, guess it doesn't work all that well all the time..? I was having a fun time chatting with my old friend and bullying Kai in her chatroom and something shocking happened. What I most feared had happened few hours ago.
Around 2am, I heard aunt panicking about grandpa. Found him lying on his bed, dad kept on talking to him right beside him. He couldn't move. He can't open his eyes, he has no control of his left part of the body, right arm kinda shaky, he refuses to go to hospital. Cousin bro, sis and aunt calls the ambulance and to be told will be arriving 10 minutes later. That is way too long. Without hesitating, dad and cousin bro carry him to the car and head to the hospital. Entered the emergency room, had brain x-ray, found out he got a stroke. This time round its moderately severed bleeding at his left brain which is much more serious than he had before. Grandpa was sent to ICU. I saw two patient in separate rooms. One of them were mourning or something. Nurses busy walking in and out for that patient's room. Doctor arrived and explain even more detail. They couldnt do anything for now as his blood pressure is high, chances any medication given may cause the veins to shrink which then will cause more problems. We had to wait for 48 hours for another check up to see if he has stabilise. Doctor said he most likely will have to stay on bed after he recovered. This is just unexpected. I couldn't held on my tears and walked out of the room. We were asked to prepare for the worst. We do know at his age, he is bound to have some serious case. Came back at 5am, couldn't sleep, couldn't work and cant stop worrying. I wish, I pray, I hope, I want him to get well. I want him to be safe for he is whom I care and love the most in my life. I do not know if dear God would answer my prayers, please let him pass through this stage.
Around 2am, I heard aunt panicking about grandpa. Found him lying on his bed, dad kept on talking to him right beside him. He couldn't move. He can't open his eyes, he has no control of his left part of the body, right arm kinda shaky, he refuses to go to hospital. Cousin bro, sis and aunt calls the ambulance and to be told will be arriving 10 minutes later. That is way too long. Without hesitating, dad and cousin bro carry him to the car and head to the hospital. Entered the emergency room, had brain x-ray, found out he got a stroke. This time round its moderately severed bleeding at his left brain which is much more serious than he had before. Grandpa was sent to ICU. I saw two patient in separate rooms. One of them were mourning or something. Nurses busy walking in and out for that patient's room. Doctor arrived and explain even more detail. They couldnt do anything for now as his blood pressure is high, chances any medication given may cause the veins to shrink which then will cause more problems. We had to wait for 48 hours for another check up to see if he has stabilise. Doctor said he most likely will have to stay on bed after he recovered. This is just unexpected. I couldn't held on my tears and walked out of the room. We were asked to prepare for the worst. We do know at his age, he is bound to have some serious case. Came back at 5am, couldn't sleep, couldn't work and cant stop worrying. I wish, I pray, I hope, I want him to get well. I want him to be safe for he is whom I care and love the most in my life. I do not know if dear God would answer my prayers, please let him pass through this stage.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
A scary moment...O.O
Aunt's house got robbed when aunt and cousin went for vacation few days back. Dad went over to her house to check and found out the drawers and cupboards were opened. Clothes were eveyrwhere, expensive jewelries were stolen, briefcase were opened....etc. I had to follow dad and cousin bro to take pictures of the raided rooms. While I was taking pictures, I heard noises. Not sure I'm paranoid or what but I heard it a couple of times. I stepped away from the windows, called cousin bro and dad up to 1st floor. Not long after they left, I heard again. I got scared. I just stopped taking pic, held the dslr tightly and wait till cousin come back up. Police can't investigate or take picture of the house unless they are back from their vacation. But it is best suggested for them to come back asap before anything more went missing. Who knows, their house may be empty for upcoming attempts O.O. I dun think they can stay there anymore, since their house got broke in. Never ever get flashy items. It will just draw wrong attention.
Not long I came back, I heard news of a friend of mine who met an accident O.O. I was shocked to hear it and that clarify his nickname. He could have lost his life. I cannot imagine if it really do happen........ Please.....appreciate your life.....dont be reckless.....
For all I know, I feel very insecure and scared.....
Not long I came back, I heard news of a friend of mine who met an accident O.O. I was shocked to hear it and that clarify his nickname. He could have lost his life. I cannot imagine if it really do happen........ Please.....appreciate your life.....dont be reckless.....
For all I know, I feel very insecure and scared.....
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
yam cha cha XD
this is really random....i just felt like blogging all of sudden and im happy =D. I came back not long from a rarest yam cha I had. Why am I still typing when I'm suppose to rush for my marker rendering tomorrow? ahhhh...whatever~
These few weeks it was raining everyday heavily and its COLD!!! I even stole Wuzzy's jacket to keep me warm in the library coz i was practically freezing there. I came back from college, changed into my short pants and jump straight to my bed with my blanket. Fan set to level 1 only. Sleep until dinner time, wake up then eat, took my bath and stone for awhile. The routine had been repeating for the past few days. Really stressed out just need to take a break. As I was resting on my bed, having this shoulder sore that irritates me, I felt vibration. Feiyan called me asking me out for yam cha at Picadilly.
So, Ajeet picked me up and we all meet up with his other friends. Turn out that it was Justin's birthday!! She didn't want to be alone besides, I live nearby so....=D. Felt bad for intruding =x. Anyway, Happy 19th Birthday to him =D. There were 9 ppl in total. They ordered a beer towel and some food. Had a sip of it, drank my hot chinese tea to warm myself. The only names I remembered are Justin the bday boy, Ming, Don, the filipino guy, the indian boy, another boy (LOL!)....yea thats all. The TV was tuned to Starworld. It was showing wrestling that time and all of us were talking about how silly or epic it is. After all of us are done with our drinks, we bid farewell and went home at 12am. It was short but nonetheless it was fun too =). Guess what...mum open the door for me....... she was waiting...... =x
Fei felt she might be giving a wrong impression to my family just bringing me out for outings at night. Knowing how my family thinking, they may have a misperception about her. The typical mind set of being influence of "hanging out" too much especially at night
would affect my studies and such. I know how it feels to be in that position. Even so, I know what is right or wrong. I know who I should or shouldn't be mixing. What's wrong with friend's smoking? Smoking doesn't prove you are a bad person. Its just an impression put upon by ppl. It is not wrong meeting new people. In fact I like meeting more ppl. I met few new ppls around this semester, got to know them well and I had fun hanging out with them, chatting and stuffs. Nevertheless, I'm grateful I met her =). God bless her.
These few weeks it was raining everyday heavily and its COLD!!! I even stole Wuzzy's jacket to keep me warm in the library coz i was practically freezing there. I came back from college, changed into my short pants and jump straight to my bed with my blanket. Fan set to level 1 only. Sleep until dinner time, wake up then eat, took my bath and stone for awhile. The routine had been repeating for the past few days. Really stressed out just need to take a break. As I was resting on my bed, having this shoulder sore that irritates me, I felt vibration. Feiyan called me asking me out for yam cha at Picadilly.
So, Ajeet picked me up and we all meet up with his other friends. Turn out that it was Justin's birthday!! She didn't want to be alone besides, I live nearby so....=D. Felt bad for intruding =x. Anyway, Happy 19th Birthday to him =D. There were 9 ppl in total. They ordered a beer towel and some food. Had a sip of it, drank my hot chinese tea to warm myself. The only names I remembered are Justin the bday boy, Ming, Don, the filipino guy, the indian boy, another boy (LOL!)....yea thats all. The TV was tuned to Starworld. It was showing wrestling that time and all of us were talking about how silly or epic it is. After all of us are done with our drinks, we bid farewell and went home at 12am. It was short but nonetheless it was fun too =). Guess what...mum open the door for me....... she was waiting...... =x
Fei felt she might be giving a wrong impression to my family just bringing me out for outings at night. Knowing how my family thinking, they may have a misperception about her. The typical mind set of being influence of "hanging out" too much especially at night
would affect my studies and such. I know how it feels to be in that position. Even so, I know what is right or wrong. I know who I should or shouldn't be mixing. What's wrong with friend's smoking? Smoking doesn't prove you are a bad person. Its just an impression put upon by ppl. It is not wrong meeting new people. In fact I like meeting more ppl. I met few new ppls around this semester, got to know them well and I had fun hanging out with them, chatting and stuffs. Nevertheless, I'm grateful I met her =). God bless her.
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