Monday, May 3, 2010

Its just how it is

I practically just want to abandon blogging. I dont feel any motivation of typing about my life. Everything had been nothing but sadness, frustration and anger. I had to endure 2 months of family frustration. Not to mention my first time witnessing such horrific actions and behaviour of my dearest family member. Screaming nonsense, shouting, hitting, throwing things, you name it. Imagining seeing all these almost everyday from morning till midnight. Bringing back the past that has no relation with younger generation and dragging them in or their childrens past. It doesnt makes sense actually. Thats how one person will act when they got lost control of themselve. He/she wouldnt care less of how bad spoken they are and hurt people's feeling. They wouldnt accept and refuse to accept the fact that lies in front of their eyes. I dont need to be reminded about the past as I have eyes to see who didnt their part as and adult. I wouldnt blame the person for reacting that way for she had been mentally tormented due to her close minded thinking, keeping everything in her heart. No one would understand what I felt unless you've experience what I've been through. I appreciate friends and family who cares for me



I am greatly affected by it and may lose my sanity anytime soon. I'm still able to keep my mind straight up till now. Probably my philosophy "I look forward and never look back" that has been pushing myself. Other than that, I cant say Im in good shape. I'm not gaining weight, my arms are skinny and low blood pressure. What's the cause of low blood pressure eh?



I do feel lonely at times since my close friends have gone overseas for studies. Even though we are separated by the huge deep ocean and time difference, that wont stop us from reaching each other!!!! T^T I shall await you guys return.........*gaze into the sky*

Its time I should stop whining about my how shit my life is now. IT'S JUST HOW LIFE IS. I will always remind myself there are other people suffer more than me. Shit things happen for some reason whether you believe it or not. It may be a test by the higher up *points* or it could be just pure bad luck. Nevertheless I'm glad my grandpa has recovered more than we could imagine. Thats all I ask. Off to play Supreme Commander with my comrades!!

3 comments:

HonWai said...

stay strong...my dear... =)

zhi ling~ said...

am here too.
the post has been so well-written... i mean for your another positive perspective despite of the shits.
you can go thru it, im sure.
hugs, my dear~
stay strong, and we are always by ur side. new sem is going to start real soon. a new start, k? :)

like u said, let's look forward and never look back!

† P§¥KØ †™ said...

lol.. ahem, forgetting about us? =p